For Zambrosia... what I've written so far...
I dialed Michael�s number with cold fingers, working up my breezy phone voice to mask my nervousness.
He answered on the first ring.
�Michael Collins�
He was always so proper, even at home on a Saturday morning. Already I could envision him pouring over legal briefs, billing clients for off hours.
�Hi Michael, it�s Lauren.� I said, automatically using the name that Daddy called me.
�Lauren�.?�
I giggled at my gaffe. �Lola� sorry� Lola.�
His voice brightened. �Lola! Hey there! I was just thinking about you.�
�You were?� I said, immediately falling into our cat and mouse game that we had played when we were going out. We had swapped a few apologetic emails but this was actually the first time we�d spoken since the night before Michael graduated from college and headed off to law school. His voice was buttery and smooth and I felt very comfortable.
We chatted a bit, politely, always with a subtext of something more, the way such things happen when you talk with someone who was once intimate with you, had seen you naked.
�I broke up with Letitia.� He said remorsefully.
�Oh, I�m sorry.� I had heard already that he had a messy breakup with the woman our mutual friends termed �psycho bitch�.
He laughed. �Oh don�t be. I was being stupid and I finally figured that out. I was an idiot, Lola.� His voice changed and I immediately knew that he wasn�t referring to his relationship problems with Letitia.
�Everyone makes mistakes.�
�I know. I should have never let you go. I was stupid and I�m sorry.�
I didn�t know what to say. �We were very young.�
�Yes. And I was an idiot. I�m hoping to make things right. The worst feeling in the world is regret and if I didn�t make some attempt to fix that, I would regret it for the rest of my life.�
My stomach fluttered. He had obviously rehearsed this and it was extremely hard for him. While he had been described in the papers as �magic in the courtroom�, Michael often got tongue-tied whenever his personal feelings were involved.
�I hope that it doesn�t offend you that I�ve inquired Mark and Julie about you a few weeks ago. They said that you�re not seeing anyone. I have a season tickets to the symphony and I was hoping that you�d join me one of these nights� There�s a performance tonight but I�m certain that it�s far too short notice for you, but maybe the Verdi in three weeks?�
I bit my lip. I hadn�t been seeing anyone when he had asked our friends about me, but that had changed with my thing with Daddy� I didn�t even know what to call it� relationship? Agreement? Fling? None of those words seemed to fit.
�Well, I must be honest with you, Micheal. I�m not exactly NOT seeing someone��
�Oh.� His voice dropped and it broke my heart.
�But I�ve only known him for a week and at the moment, I am able to�� My voice trailed off. It felt horribly wrong to be agreeing to this, even though I knew that Daddy had ordered it. ��I guess I�d love to go to the symphony with you tonight.�
He exhaled heavily into the phone and almost squeaked, �That�s great!� I giggled because I had forgotten the way he lost control of his voice when he got excited. But even my amusement was dampened by the fact that two weeks before, I would have been ecstatic to receive a call such as this from an old flame, while now I could only think of a rough man in a cabin deep in the woods.
�What do you think about dinner? Angline�s? Or maybe you�d like La Tredet better? Or whatever you�d like.� His words tumbled out over themselves.
�Whichever you�d like.� I answered automatically falling into the role Daddy had created for me.
�No, we�ll go wherever you like.�
�Um� La Tredet would be lovely.�
�Oh, and� would you like any wine or champagne or anything at the symphony? I have a box and I can order some to be put there ahead of time.� His voice held just a tint of boasting.
�I like Champagne.�
�Well, I think it�s just sparkling wine.�
�That�s good too.�
�Do you want to drive or should I pick you up in my car?�
�You can pick me up.�
Even as we finalized our plans, I could only think that Daddy would have had everything orchestrated for me.
